Friday, May 1, 2009

Sample Schedules: Trio Schedules

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This is a post for me to put our daily schedule with the three children as they grow. You can see Sample Schedules: Tandem Schedules for sample schedules of two children together, Sample Schedules for solo schedules 0-12 months, and Sample Schedules: One Year and Up for solo schedules one year and older. I will add to this as time passes:

Newborn (McKenna), Almost 2 Year Old (Kaitlyn), and Almost 4 Year Old (Brayden)

7:00 AM--Brayden, Kaitlyn, and I eat breakfast. We then clean up.
7:45 AM--Brayden and Kaitlyn start sibling playtime.
7:45-8:00 AM--I get McKenna up to eat. During this waketime, I wash McKenna's hair when needed, do sponge baths/real baths, clean her face, and change her into her day clothes.
8:30 AM--McKenna down for nap. I get the older two from sibling playtime.
8:40 AM--Bath and get ready for the day for Brayden and Kaitlyn.
9:30 AM--TV time for Brayden and Kaitlyn.
10:00 AM--Independent play starts for Brayden and Kaitlyn.
10:30 AM--I get McKenna up to eat.
11:15 AM--McKenna down for nap by this time.
11:30 AM--Brayden, Kaitlyn, and I clean up after independent playtime. They then watch TV while I get lunch ready.
12:00 PM--Brayden, Kaitlyn, and I eat lunch. We then clean up. Following lunch, we play outside if weather is nice. If not, we color or do some other activity inside.
1:00 PM--Nap time for Brayden and Kaitlyn.
1:30 PM--I get McKenna up to eat.
2:15 PM--McKenna is down for her nap by this time.
3:00 PM--Brayden's nap is over. We do formal learning activities/lessons.
3:30 PM--Brayden has time to play video games. Sometimes he wants to wait for Daddy to get home to play. In that case, he and I clean together.
4:00 PM--Kaitlyn is often up by this point. I get McKenna up to eat between 4:00 and 4:30.
4:30 PM--Daddy home.
5:00 PM--Dinner

After dinner, we have free play time and our day is not as structured. We do a variety of activities dependent on the day of the week and the weather.

7:00 PM--I get McKenna up. My husband gets the older two children ready for bed. I usually read stories to Brayden while I nurse McKenna.
7:30 PM--Kaitlyn in bed.
7:45 PM--McKenna in bed by this point.
8:00 PM--Brayden in bed by this point.
10:00 PM--I get McKenna up to eat. No waketime--straight back to bed.

McKenna then eats two other times in the night. The first is often around 2 AM. I wake her for the second.

1 Month old (McKenna), 2 Year old (Kaitlyn), and almost 4 Year old (Brayden)
The schedule is pretty much the same right now:

7:00 AM--Brayden, Kaitlyn, and I eat breakfast. We then clean up.
7:30-7:45 AM--Brayden and Kaitlyn start sibling playtime.
7:45-8:00 AM--I get McKenna up to eat. During this waketime, I wash McKenna's hair when needed, do sponge baths/real baths, clean her face, and change her into her day clothes.
8:30 AM--McKenna down for nap. I get the older two from sibling playtime.
8:40 AM--Bath and get ready for the day for Brayden and Kaitlyn.
9:30 AM--TV time for Brayden and Kaitlyn.
10:00 AM--Independent play starts for Brayden and Kaitlyn.
10:30 AM--I get McKenna up to eat. I often do tummy time during this waketime.
11:15 AM--McKenna down for nap by this time.
11:30 AM--Brayden, Kaitlyn, and I clean up after independent playtime. They then watch TV while I get lunch ready.
12:00 PM--Brayden, Kaitlyn, and I eat lunch. We then clean up. Following lunch, we play outside if weather is nice. If not, we color or do some other activity inside.
1:00 PM--Nap time for Brayden and Kaitlyn.
1:30 PM--I get McKenna up to eat. I have been working on her smiles during this waketime.
2:15 PM--McKenna is down for her nap by this time.
3:00 PM--Brayden's nap is over. We do formal learning activities/lessons.
3:30 PM--Brayden has time to play video games. Sometimes he wants to wait for Daddy to get home to play. In that case, he and I clean together.
4:00 PM--Kaitlyn is often up by this point. I get McKenna up to eat between 4:00 and 4:30.
4:30 PM--Daddy home.
5-5:30 PM--McKenna down by this point.
5:00-6:00 PM--Dinner. The exact time depends on what time McKenna at and what I made for dinner. For example, a meal in the slow cooker is done by then while other meals will require some preparation.

After dinner, we have free play time and our day is not as structured. We do a variety of activities dependent on the day of the week and the weather.

7:00 PM--I get McKenna up. My husband gets the older two children ready for bed. I usually read stories to Brayden while I nurse McKenna.
7:30 PM--Kaitlyn in bed.
7:45 PM--McKenna in bed by this point.
8:00 PM--Brayden in bed by this point.
10:00 PM--I get McKenna up to eat. No waketime--straight back to bed.

Right now at one month old, she is waking twice in the night, but showing signs of being ready to go down to one. As I write this, she is having a growth spurt. My hunch is that she will drop to one feeding in the night once the growth spurt is over.

7 MONTH OLD (McKenna), 2.5 YEAR OLD (Kaitlyn), 4.5 YEAR OLD (Brayden)
A notable change in our day is that Brayden started Preschool shortly before McKenna turned six months old. He only goes three days a week, so each day is a bit different.

PRESCHOOL DAYS
6:30 AM--Mommy gets up and showers before everyone else gets up.
7:00 AM--Brayden, Kaitlyn, and Mommy eat breakfast. We then clean up breakfast. We then talk about our learning theme of the day.
7:40ish AM--Brayden and Kaitlyn take a fast bath and get all ready for the day.
8:00 AM--Brayden and Kaitlyn have Sibling Playtime.
8:05 AM--McKenna wakes up, nurses, then eats breakfast. I then dress her for the day and she has independent playtime. I do some cleaning around the house.
9:00 AM--We get Brayden's shoes, jacket, and backpack on.
9:15 AM--The carpool comes to get Brayden. One day a week, I drive. My parents stay with Kaitlyn and McKenna and I drop the kids off, then go run errands, then pick the kids up. During that time, McKenna naps as usual and Kaitlyn just plays with the grandparents.
9:20 AM--Kaitlyn starts independent playtime.
9:30 AM--McKenna goes down for a nap.
10:45-11:00 AM--Kaitlyn gets out of independent play. She has TV time.
11:30 AM--Kaitlyn has learning time. We then get lunch ready.
12:00 PM--McKenna wakes and nurses
12:15 PM--Brayden gets home. We then have lunch. Brayden and Kaitlyn then have free playtime until nap.
1:00 PM--Brayden has rest time and Kaitlyn has nap time. McKenna has blanket time.
1:30 PM--McKenna nap time.
2:00 PM--Brayden gets up. He starts independent playtime.
3:00 PM--Brayden has some learning time. He then plays PBSkids.org games.
4:10 PM--McKenna nurses and eats dinner.
4:20 PM--Daddy gets home. We then have family time and do various things. We have dinner, work on chores, and do things together as a family. While I am working on dinner, the kids have table learning activities and McKenna practices eating finger foods.
4:30 PM--Wake Kaitlyn up. Sometimes she wakes up by 4, in which case I get her up. If not, we get her by 4:30.
6:00 PM--McKenna nap
7:30 PM-Start bedtime routine (if not already started)
7:45 PM--Get McKenna up for final feeding
8:00 PM--Brayden and Kaitlyn in bed.
8:15 PM--McKenna in bed.

If my husband is not around for bedtime, then I start Brayden and Kaitlyn getting ready for bed by 7:00 so I can have them in bed in time to get McKenna up by 8:00.

Non-PRESCHOOL DAYS
Only the morning is different on non-preschool days:

6:30 AM--Mommy gets up and showers.
7:00-7:30 AM--Mommy, Brayden, and Kaitlyn have breakfast. We then clean up and discuss our learning activities of the day. Brayden and Kaitlyn then have sibling playtime.
8:00 AM--McKenna gets up and nurses and eats breakfast. She then has a bath and I get her ready for the day. She then has independent playtime.

Then it varies. I sometimes will start bath before McKenna goes down for a nap, but I usually wait until she is down for a nap. Then they take a long bath and play. After bath, Brayden has TV time and Kaitlyn has independent playtime. Then things are pretty much the same as other days.

43 comments:

Libbi said...

My DS is 3 months old and is eating 7 time/day. I have two issues, and they may be related. Ideally he eats at 7:00, 10:00, 1:00, 4:00, 6:30, 8:30, 10:30 (dreamfeed). However, the last week or so, about half the time he wakes up between 5:30-6:30 ready to eat. Then he will go back to sleep and I will have to wake him up at 10! Any advice on how to get a consistent wake-time at 7:00? The other issue is that my sitter often has trouble getting him to take more than 2-3 oz at the 10 & 1 feedings from the bottle, even if his last feeding was at 5:30!!! Anyone have any advice???

Jennifer said...

I'm pretty sure Valerie will suggest waking your DS at 7:00 am even if he has eaten only an hour before. That way his body gets used to getting up at that time. If he wakes at 6:30, then maybe that is within your 30 minute wake time window and that you begin his day then.

Maybe this post will help: http://babywisemom.blogspot.com/2008/01/early-morning-feedings-before-waketime.html

I don't have any suggestions for helping him take any more at 10 & 1 though, sorry!

Jennifer said...

Thanks for this post, Valerie! It seems to work so seamlessly together. :) Have you been able to get out much with all three kids during the day? If so, when do you do that?

Nikki said...

For those of you who have more than one child...Do you have any suggestions on using more than one baby monitor in the house? I have a newborn and a toddler who are in separate rooms on the 2nd floor and we can't use the same monitor we have for my toddler because of interferance. They sleep with the doors closed and I can't necessarily switch the one monitor I have back and forth because of the way it's set up. Thanks! -Nikki

Kyle, Amanda, and Tobias said...

Libbi, I agree with Jennifer that if he wakes at 5:30am to eat then go ahead and feed him, put him down, and wake him at 7:00am for another feeding. This will likely be a shorter feeding but he will gradually drop the 5:30am feeding once he realizes that is still nighttime and not time to eat and play. Also, we had this early waking issue around 5 months old and we simply decided that unless our son cried we would leave him. Turns out he would talk for 30 minutes then fall back to sleep again and wake at the normal time. So if your LO is just talking or grumbling to himself, not crying I would let him play in the crib for a bit to reinforce that it is still nighttime. if he cries, go with my previous suggestion.

For the small 10am feeding, perhaps try waiting 5-10 minutes after he's been awake and also maybe feed him 1-2 oz., change his diaper, and then feed another 1-2 oz if possible. It still counts as one feeding but with the diaper change in the middle. Also try to burp him a lot because if he is gassy that would make him uninterested in food. I hope some of that helps!

Valerie, these combo posts are great, I may recommend them to my cousin who has a 3 yr. old, 1.5 yr. old, and twins due in September. She'll be one busy mommy :) --Amanda

overlyactive said...

Do you wake your older kids up or do you wait till they get themselves up for naps?

Penny said...

Hi Valerie,
I've been following your blog with interest for a couple of months now - fantastic stuff!!

I also have 3 children: 5yo boy, 2.5yo girl and 3.5month boy. I have been using BW since the eldest was born. My life (and therefore the baby's routine) is complicated this year by our trip to school each weekday morning which takes around 1.5hrs return (including a short walk and some time in the classroom before lessons start).

Baby rarely sleeps well during this time as he is in and out of the car and pram. He usually manages a 45min nap between the first feed (7:15) and the second (10.15ish). On Saturday, the only day that we are home during this timeslot, he cannot get back to sleep after the 45mins.

The rest of the day his naps are generally fine (1.5 to 2hrs), unless over-stimulated by additional outings (grocery shopping etc), which I am keeping to the absolute minimum. I have arrangements with other mums to bring my eldest home from school most afternoons, so these are not a problem for the baby.

Anyway this huge long post is just really to say hi, glad to meet you! And to ask for any tips you might suggest in my situation (ie the morning nap issue). And also to say that even though I am unable to implement an ideal BW routine, without BW, I believe my whole day would be chaotic and completely unmanageable. Yay for BW! Penny

Erin L said...

I have one child 14 mo. boy and we hope to have more kids and to get pregnant again soon. I sometimes wonder how I will manage having more than one child, so it is great seeing your sample schedule.

My husband and I have decided not to have a TV, so there is no TV/movie time for our little one. Instead of movie time my son has more free play time. Sometimes my son gets bored during those times when I need to get things done and he is tired of his toys and the pots and pans etc. I know there must be other babywise families out there who don't have a TV. Any other families have ideas of extra activities their children can do in place of TV/movie time?

Nikki said...

Hi Erin, We are in the same boat as you, except our daughter gets to see elmo's world only once a day. I just bought a book called "the toddler's busy book" to get ideas. I've thumbed through it and so far I think it will be very helpful! You can check out reviews for yourself on amazon.com , Nikki

Michael and Natalie said...

Even though my LO is past this stage, I noticed that in the schedule you listed you didn't mention when the nap for McKenna occurred between 4 pm and 7 pm. More specifically I notice that she gets up at 4-430 then the next thing you mention about her is that she gets up at 7 pm. When does she go down after she gets up at 4-4:30?
Also, I want you to know that I am VERY much looking forward to your post on emotions. I had a tremendously difficult time after my daughter was born and I wish that post partum issues were discussed at length somewhere on the blog.

Good luck!!

Libbi said...

Thanks, Amanda & Jennifer - so far, if he wakes before 6 then I wake him at 7:00. If it is after - I stretch him till 10. I also try to cut down on the amount of time he nurses if it is before 6:00, so that he gets a good full feeding at 7:00. I am debating switching bottles (for the 3rd time), to see if that helps, b/c the days when he BF's exclusively he sleeps much better at night. If anyone else has had this experience, please let me know!!!

overlyactive said...

Erin-
I commend you for doing no TV/movie time. We rarely watch as well, we like to book or puzzle time instead. These are a little quiet activities that seem to interest them. We usually have them do it in their rooms.

Plowmanators said...

Libbi,

Jennifer is right (thanks!). You want to start your day at the same time within a 30 minute window. So when he wakes at 6:30, I would just say he is 30 minutes ahead of schedule and move on with the day. Since he sleeps until he next feeding, that shouldn't be a problem.

I don't know about the not eating at 10 thing. I would say he needs a longer interval, but from 5:30-10 is 4.5 hours...that is plenty long. ???????

Plowmanators said...

Jennifer, I have been able to get stuff done. I just work like mad during certain times. I have independent playtime and afternoon nap time to do stuff. It is tricky to balance everything, and I have pretty much cut out sewing, making jewelry, scrapbooking, etc. for now. Hopefully I can add those back in slowly over time :)

Plowmanators said...

Nikki,

Each of our children have their own monitors. Brayden has an old Fisher Price monitor we bought when he was a baby (a cheap one). Kaitlyn has an inexpensive Fisher Price monitor that we bought just before McKenna was born. McKenna has a Graco monitor that we used with Kaitlyn when she was a baby. We moved that to McKenna's room because it has great range and newborns sleep more often, so I knew we would be out side while she was asleep a lot. McKenna also has a Summer video monitor in her room. We don't have problem with interference and they all use the same type of frequency. It must be the different monitors. So all of that to say I would buy different monitors.

Graco also makes a monitor for two children. You have one reciever with different lights for each child. We were going to buy one of those, but decided to go with the less expensive route of monitor.

Plowmanators said...

Amanda, thanks for your tips for Libbi. All excellent.

Plowmanators said...

Amanda, oh my! Twins...I worried McKenna would be a twin. Talk about busy! Yep, she will be.

Plowmanators said...

overlyactive,

I wake them. I rarely need to wake Brayden up, but I do if needed. Kaitlyn also usually wakes on her own. When Brayden was Kaitlyn's age, I often needed to wake him up, but Kaitlyn sleeps more hours at night than he did.

Plowmanators said...

Penny, good to meet you to!

That is a hard situation and one I hope to avoid as best possible :)

I might try a carpool situation where you took turns with moms taking...it sounds like some bring him home. That would make disruptions more infrequent.

If baby is out of the carseat for part of it (it sounds like you said a walk and in classroom?) you could try a sling and see if baby would sleep in that.

When you get home, if baby will sleep in the swing I would try that.

Good luck!

Plowmanators said...

Erin L.,

That is great! I think you are on the right track...free playtime. Or you could do structured playtime. Either way, you want to give your child something to be doing that is productive and captivating for him. This will vary based on child and age of child. As he gets older, he will have more interest in crafty things like play doh, coloring, painting, etc. While these wouldn't be activities you would want him doing without your supervision (at least I wouldn't), they are activities you can add to the day so when it is time for the toys he is less bored.

Also, keep toys fresh and interesting and age appropriate. See the blog label "best toys for baby" for the posts by age. Also, you can put toys away in a closet somewhere and rotate what is available and what isn't. When they don't have them for a while, it is like they are new.

When Brayden was two, during his "TV time" he didn't really watch TV. He drove his cars on the couch while he was in the room and the TV was on.

You could play cars with him while nursing. I read to Kaitlyn often times while nursing. At first you want to be able to give as much attention to the baby as possible since they are so sleepy, but once baby eats without constant prodding, you can offer attention to the older child. Of course then the baby will hit about 4 months and be too distracted... ;)

Plowmanators said...

Nikki, thanks for sharing that book! I always love to hear of good books to check out.

Plowmanators said...

Natalie, thanks for bringing that to my attention. I will add it in.

I hope you have seen the emotions post (posted last week). It is something that needs to be discussed more :)

Plowmanators said...

Libbi, Have you tried the Adiri bottle? It is very similar to breastfeeding.

Billie said...

I love your blog. I just started BW 9 days ago when my daughter was 9-weeks old. I'm having a difficult time because my baby won't sit on her own, she always wants to be held. She screams when I put her in the swing or vibrating chair. I usually put her in a baby wrap and wear her as much as I can, but she's starting to get heavy and I really would like work towards putting her in the swing. Any suggestions?

To compound the situation, my baby now 10-weeks old won't take a pacifier or drink from a bottle. I have to go back to work in 3-weeks and I'm starting to freak out about how the babysitter is going to handle having to give her a bottle. To make matters a little worse, my baby won't nap. I put her in the crib and she'll screech and scream for 45 minutes, sleep for 20. I'm lucky if she naps for 20 minutes twice a day.

As I'm writing this, I'm realizing that my baby is very high maintenance and I'm worried about leaving her with the babysitter when I have to go back to work.

Any advice would be greatly appreciated!

Plowmanators said...

Billie, I am sorry this is so late; you have already gone back to work! Let me know if you still need some help.

ashleywheatley said...

Thank you so much for your blog it has been so helpful! I have a 5 week old son and have been starting babywise, but just still have some questions and find myself very confused!
1. As far as the schedule my question is:
We are trying to do
(8-8)
8, 11, 2, 5, 7:30 , and then a Dream Feed at 10:30, he sometimes gets up 2 times in the night, but last night just got up once.
My question about Babywise and where I get confused is the naps.
My son can stay up about 45 minutes and he eats every 3 hours.
So If I put him down at 8:45 and get him up at 11 to eat, that is a 2 hour and 15 minute nap , but Babywise says their naps should be 1-1.5 hours. I get confused what the extra time is for if they don't nap for the remaining time in the 3 hour window
(2 hours and 15 minutes)? The math doesn't add up to me?
2. Also after the 5:00 feeding, what time should I wake my son? I was having him down by about 5:45, and he nurses again at 7:30. We do a bath before the 7:30 feeding as well. So what time should I wake him ? Do I let him sleep till we start his bath at 7:15 or get him up around 7? Is this nap just supposed to be considered a cat nap and just shorter?
3. Also last night after the Dream Feed, he woke to nurse at 2:30 am, and then not again till 7 am..
I was very confused on how to get my day back to my 8:00 start time since he woke at 7 to eat.
I would appreciate any advice and help!
Thank you so much , I am just confused!
Ashley

Plowmanators said...

Ashleywheatly

1-That is an inconsistency in the book and, yes, confusing and math doesn't add up. With my third, I just let her sleep all she wanted. She stayed up for 45 minutes, but ate every three hours, so her naps were long, too. She is fine today :)

2-I would get him up when you are ready for him. That nap can be a catnap, but isn't for all babies. It was for my son but not my girls.

3-See the post "early morning feedings before waketime"

It sounds like you have a good little sleeper on your hands :)

ashleywheatley said...

Thank you so much for your help! I truly appreciate it!
1. I guess i am wondering what the expectation for nap lengths are. He is now sometimes waking early (not always), but if he wakes an hour, or 45 minutes, or 30 minutes early, do I let him CIO or move to swing like the suggestions to get them to finish the nap in the nap posts, or do I just let him get up, but not feed yet? Is the goal for a nap about 2 hours and the goal to try to make them finish that 2 hour nap?
2. I also am realizing he takes many naps that his eyes are open and he makes little noises, and maybe even moves some, grunts, etc... but isn't crying. So basically he is awake most of the nap, (we have a video monitor so that is how I know)... is this bad? He is in his crib, not crying, but also not sleeping all of the nap. Just curious if this is normal ? He was just diagnosed with reflux, so it may be that he is just uncomfortable. But it makes me wonder if I am trying to get him to nap too long or if I should just extend his waketime.
3. As far as my catnap question, he now wakes on his own sometimes after 30 minutes, so we get him. I am still trying to figure out this time of night though b/c his "fussy" time is around 8 when we try to put him down for bed. And I am just not sure if that catnap has allowed him to not be tired or maybe it is the reflux bothering him since he is going to bed after I nurse him and hasn't had waketime, or if it is just the witching hour. But if he didn't have the catnap , he would be staying awake from 5:00-8:00 and that seems too long.. so does it make sense to just put him down after the 5:00 nursing and waketime ,and just let him get up naturally on his own, but maybe not past 7:00? Thank you so much!!!!

ashleywheatley said...

ps- i just read your post on calculating waketime- and noticed you said it starts from the second the wakeup- so does that mean if they wake 30 minutes early, you start counting then, or do you start when you actually go in their room and get them? so for example, if they wake early, but you try to let them CIO , do you start when they actually wake, or when you actually get them?
thanks!!!!

Candice said...

I need advice...I take care of a 10 month old, 12 month old, and 3 year old in one room from 10-6 everyday and am having a hard time finding a schedule that works. Any suggestions??

Plowmanators said...

AshleyWheatley,

Since he is usually a great sleeper, any time he wakes early, I would feed him.

That was my rule with McKenna since she rarely woke early.

You could wait for about 10 minutes or so and see if he is just having a rough transition. There were times McKenna woke early and the older two were in the tub, so I would race to get them out and dressed and by the time they were, she was back asleep.

In general, you want about a 1.5-2 hour nap. Some babies need a longer nap.

But something else for you to consider with early waking is the reflux because that does cause early wakings.

2-Around that age, McKenna did that, too. I am not sure why. It was odd. If I didn't have a video monitor, I never would have known. You can try to mess with waketime if you want. See also the blog label "wonder weeks"

3-I would probably try to get some waktime in after nursing due to the reflux. He definitely still needs the catnap until about 3.5-4 months old.

4-at that age, yes, you need to count waketime as soon as they wake up. For some babies, time spent in the crib happy isn't minute for minute counted as waketime. But at that age, you need to count each minute awake as wake time.

Plowmanators said...

Candice, is this a daycare situation? Are you all literally in the same room all day long?

Candice said...

Yes, we are litteraly in one room all day, from 10 to 6.

ashleywheatley said...

Thank you so much for your help and taking the time to respond! This blog and you are a blessing!

Plowmanators said...

Candice,

So the now 11 month old will need two naps during the day, but probably only one while with you. Same for the now 13 month old. That will be in the afternoon sometime--probably around 1.

I would have the 3 year old take a nap or have rest time at the same time so things can be as quiet as possible.

I would have a humidifier or some sort of sound machine in the room. That will help the kids cancel each other's noises out.

Have lunch for all around 11:30ish.

After lunch, do some art time.

What is the room set up like? Do you have beds for each child to sleep in? How large is the room?

The more information I can have about the room itself, the better I can help you figure out how to make it all work.

Also, are you able to go outside at all?

Kristin said...

Independent play for 1 1/2 hours? That just seems like a miracle for me. I know you did your work to get there, but I still just think it's amazing. Are they in separate rooms? Can they hear each other? I have a 3 1/2 year old and a 1 1/2 year old and the thought of that sounds heavenly, but also unattainable (because I didn't do my homework). Any time I put my oldest in his room to play by himself he acts as though he is being punished. Any suggestions?

Plowmanators said...

Kristin,

They are in separate rooms. In our old house, they could hear each other and would often talk through the heat registers. In our current house, they can't hear each other, but Kaitlyn and McKenna can...they just aren't at a point of trying to have talks yet :) This house is a bit more sound proof, though.

Have you read my post on starting independent playtime late? That might give you ideas.

You also might want to just kind of start "cold turkey" with I would say 20 minutes or so. Do the exact time you think is best, but keep in mind that for a 3.5 year old, a longer time like that is more appropriate than a 5 minute time you would do with a 14 month old. It needs to be long enough that he is forced to either have fun or be sad the whole time. Too short and he will be able to just cry until time is up.

I would just set the timer and tell him when the timer goes off, he can get out. Get out some toys for him and tell him it will be more fun to play with toys during the time than to cry. Then just leave him. He is old enough to get it.

Just be ready to stick out some rough days. My guess is that he should be over it in less than one week.

Then I would stick with 20 minutes for a week. Then start adding time in 5-10 increments.

kmspillman said...

Hi Valerie,

I know this is an older post, but wanted to place this comment in the most appropriate place. I just received a link to an article from someone who knows that I am considering having a third child. The article and the comments that follow give a rather bleak outlook on having 3 children stating that it is the most stressful number of children to have. I wondered what insight you could give in regards to the article. I know that it won't be all coming up roses and that it will be stressful, but I can't help but think that these comments and those mentioned in the article more than likely do not follow Babywise. I'm a Babywise mom and would like to think that practicing such would greatly bring down the level of stress that would come with three kids. Here's a link to the article. Any thoughts/advice would be greatly appreciated!

http://www.huffingtonpost.com/2013/05/07/three-children-is-most-st_n_3229032.html

John and Andrea said...

Hello! Let me start by saying that this blog has been invaluable in my mommy journey thus far. Thank you for all the time you put in to make a BW friendly place to learn and get info and help! I need some advice! I have three kids R-5 A-2.5 and J-9m. J's doing really well but we're struggling with going to a 4 hour schedule mostly because of school pick up in the afternoon for R. Currently her day looks like this:
7:00 wake/nurse/solids
9:00 nap
11:00 wake/nurse/solids
12:30 nap
2:00 wake/nurse
(2:30 pick up son from school)
4:00 nap (some days)
5:00 wake/nurse/solids
7:30 nurse/bedtime (earlier if no nap)

The end of the day really gets crammed in there and I know that she can do 4 hours I just don't know how to coordinate it with that school pick up in the middle of the day. One suggestion has been to wake J up at 6:30 and start the 4 hour there doing a combo 3.5/4 hour mix, I'm hesitant as we have no need to be up then and she wakes so nicely at 7 everyday. Do you see any other solutions? what would you do? Thanks! Andrea

Valerie Plowman said...

There are a couple of things I would do.

One, I would not wake earlier in the day. I find the time my a babies woke as babies is the time they naturally wake up at as older kids. All three of my older ones are that way.

Best case, I would find someone to watch the baby while you did pick ups.

If that wasn't possible, I would carpool so at least every day isn't disrupted.

I would not wake J and nurse before picking up. I would wake at last minute, pick up, and then nurse when you get home. That at least gives it a bit longer of a nap.

Robzwife said...

I have seen other posts where you mention stairs. Are you going up and down stairs several times a day with your newborn? We are having our third child soon, and this will be the first time with a two story house. Also, I don't feel comfortable leaving my toddler and preschooler downstairs while tending to a newborn upstairs. So, that means they would have to go up and down with me each time, I guess. How did you handle all of that?

Danielle said...

Valerie, thanks for your hard work on the blog! It has been my best resource for so many years! I have 4 kids- 7, 5, 2, and 4 months. I am looking for info on schedules with school age children. My biggest hiccup is not wanting all of the babies wake time to be in the car. School pickup and drop off are about 45 minutes so if I tack on eating then at the moment two of his four wake times during the day would be fully in the car.

Valerie Plowman said...

Danielle,

I have a post that can give you ideas on ways to make that easier: http://www.babywisemom.com/2013/02/managing-baby-plus-older-kids-activities.html?m=1

If the ideas there can't be used, you will just have to have those waketimes in the car. It isn't ideal, but there isn't a way around it unless you homeschool. It is just part of life as a fourth child. Plus, it will not be long before he will be awake longer.

You can focus on trying to make the car waketimes more enriching. Listen to music and/or listen to books and it will be time well spent.

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