Friday, July 19, 2013

Finding Confidence

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I was a somewhat reluctant Babywise mom.  My husband's boss gave me Babywise I and II for my shower and I just added them to the stack of baby books I received.  Like most new moms, I focused so much on the pregnancy instead of how to raise the baby once they were here. Moreover, my mom was in my ear constantly about not being a "book parent".  

After my daughter was born, I was overwhelmed.  I was recovering (emotionally and physically) from an unexpected cesarean.  I had a newborn that I had no idea how to take care of.  I didn't have a ton of breastfeeding support (besides my amazing husband).  Instead of most moms, I wasn't looking for sleeping advice because my child didn't sleep at night.  She was a sleeping pro - so much so that she lost a significant amount of weight and wasn't eating properly.  "Don't wake a sleeping baby!"  "She will wake up if she's hungry!"  "Hungry babies eat!"  I eventually picked Babywise out of the stack of books because it was short and I was desperate.  (I mean, who has time with a newborn to read an anthology?!)

It was like I was reading advice from my own head.  It just made sense.  All of it.  I immediately got out my notebook and started my daughter on a schedule the next day.  Out of the swing and into the crib.  Official schedule.  Naps.  Bedtimes.  Feedings at appropriate mealtimes.  SANITY.  Instead of staring at the clock waiting for my husband to get home from work, I could enjoy my day and enjoy my daughter.  

I won't say that it's been easy.  Quite the contrary, actually.  It was hard to find the confidence in myself that I knew how to take care of my baby.  It was hard to hear, "Mom is smarter than baby.  Mom not baby decides."  I panicked when I read those words and thought, "This mom does NOT know!"  But it's true.  I can see the bigger picture.  I am smart.  I knew all along what was best for her, but I let other advice and my own doubts cloud my judgment.  

Babywise is more than sleep advice.  It's a life philosophy going beyond just how to raise children.  It helped me realize my parenting confidence and is helping my daughter reach her full potential because she is well-rested, happy, and thriving.  I am a happier person and we are a better family for it.  I am so thankful.

Kara Hoholik
1 year old daughter
www.wordpress.com/kmhoho (though I haven't YET written about bw...I think I feel a new post idea coming on!)

1 comment:

Vicky said...

I completely agree and feel exactly the same way. I had so many people my age who were already parents telling me all if these things...and I feel that my 15 month old daughter to calmer, more well-rested and thriving much more than the kids of those advice givers! Also when I tell everyone that my daughter has been sleeping through the night at 6 weeks and currently stil takes 2 solid 2 hour naps and sleeps 12 hours at night doesn't whine for sleep or snacks though out the day they all say "oh you got lucky wait till the next kid". I tell them it's babywise and the scoff...but I feel like I am one of the most well-rested first time stay-at-home moms I know!!

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