Friday, March 4, 2016

Don't Feel Guilty About the Ebbs and Flows of Parenting

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Clearly I had messed up. There she was with her little diva attitude trying idea 5001 on how to delay nap time. When it wasn't working, she really lost it. I had done it. Again. I had allowed a child to slip into having too many freedoms. Now came the fun of reigning those in.

At times, parenting can feel like a long list of mistakes and regrets. Hindsight is 20/20, and as you look back at the decisions you made with your perfect retrospective vision, you can see where you went wrong and what you should have done instead. You will realize you kept your baby awake too long and that led to short naps. You will realize you handled a discipline situation all wrong and feel like worst parent in the history of parenting.

Conversely, sometimes you will look back and say, "I rocked that!" You will have times you handle everything perfectly! But of course, being the human you are, you will make mistakes. Again! Even after that perfect day.

Parenting is full of ebbs and flows. Ups and downs. Highs and lows. I know it is easier said than I wrote about considering the source of your guilt. I hope you have read that and internalized it. If you are feeling like you need to improve and can improve, that is the Lord helping you become a better you. If you feel like you messed up and there is no hope for you ever, that is the Adversary tearing you down. What better way to stunt the progress of children than to stunt the ability of their parents?
done, but your best thing is to recognize your shortcomings, work to correct them, and move forward. Don't beat yourself up. Last year,

Ebbs and flows will come. Do not let them make you feel like a failure. EVERYONE has them. Do the best you can do and make corrections where you can. Then move forward in the game of parenting. Be open to improving yourself, but don't open wounds in yourself because you need to improve. If you aren't perfect, congratulate yourself on being human. Fix what you can. Then brace yourself for the next tide.

2 comments:

Christina Guzman said...

Hi, my name is Christina and I just wanted to sah thank you so much for posting this! I'm a first time mom to a 3 month old baby girl and I tend to feel guilty a lot. This post made me smile and made me remember once again that im human and with parenting you learn things along the way. It's trial and error. Which helps take some of the pressure off.

Valerie Plowman said...

Hi Christina,

You are so welcome! Thank you for taking the time to say thank you :)

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