Reader 45 Minute Nap Questions

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  • bradysmom said…
    I have a question because I am really at a loss. My baby is 20 weeks old. Since about 13 weeks he has consistently been waking up 45 min. into his nap crying. He never cries any other time. I used to use a pacifier for naps only, but in the last week took it away as he was waking up when he lost his pacifier. I have tried shortening his wake time. I have tried everything and I cannot figure out what to do. I would say 2 days out of 7 does he sleep through that 45 minute mark. I really am at a loss. Please help me!!!! I know that he is not ready to get up because if I go in there and help him he goes back to sleep. I have tried CIO, but the only thing it does it get him madder, and madder and he ends up crying the entire rest of his nap. I really don’t know what to do!!!
    June 23, 2008 7:58 AM
    bradysmom said…
    Brady’s mom again. I really dont’ know what to do. He will not nap past 45 min. His last nap he woke up after 30 min. I have tried everything. Now I’m crying all day too. Please – any suggestion would help.
    June 23, 2008 2:08 PM
    Catherine said…
    Hi Bradysmom,I’m sure Valerie will have a great answer for you, but I just wanted you to know that I’ve totally been through the same thing. I feel your pain. One thing that worked well for us was to alternate napping in the crib and the swing. So, if my son had a nap where he woke up early and cried, or never fell asleep, I’d get him up at our 2.5 hr mark and then the next nap I’d put him in the swing from the beginning, and he’d usually fall asleep and stay asleep. Sometimes these little ones just need some help, especially when they become overtired. This wasn’t a permanent solution for us, but it has helped a whole lot. I just thought I’d throw it out there- I felt so badly for you, I know what that’s like. Just know that you will get through it, and you will have a great napper one day!!! It will be worth it!
    June 23, 2008 10:57 PM
    Plowmanators said…
    Bradysmom,Know that you are at an age that is hard in general for many many babies. I will link several posts for you at the end. My recomendation would be to do what you can to figure it out, but then just relax and accept it. Just expect the short nap, and any longer nap will be happy for you :). My son took 45 minute naps until he was 6.5 months old. Then he just suddenly started sleeping 2 hours. I have several theories as to why, and those theories are outlined in posts. I have a friend who has a 1 year old who has always taken short naps. This friend really gets the theory of Babywise. She has made a valiant effort to change things. But her daughter still takes short naps. It just is what it is. So relax. You don’t want to turn this into a situation where you won’t enjoy your baby. You only have an only baby once (um, unless you only have one child 🙂 ); really try to enjoy where he is right now.
    Let Your Schedule Serve You, You Don’t Serve Your Schedule:
    4 month Sleep Problems :
    45 Minute Intruder:
    Naps: Troubleshooting:
    June 24, 2008 10:38 AM
    Plowmanators said…
    Catherine,Thanks for your response! It was also good because I was notified of your comment but no one else’s!
    June 24, 2008 10:41 AM
    Hannah S. said…
    This is a comment for Bradysmom and anyone else dealing with 45 minute naps:I have had the same issues with both of my girls.Just know you aren’t alone and that it is a very commom nap issue. My 1st daugter did this for her whole 1st year. With my 18 wk old I tried cio when she would wake up when she was about 10 wks – and like you ended up crying all day too!So, after trying cio for a couple of weeks and trying to shorten wake times and watching for the perfect moment of sleepy signs, I took Valerie’s advice of accepting it and I was able to enjoy my baby again. Oh happy day! I let a month or so go by and just this past week I tried cio again just to see what would happen and she has done much better at going back to sleep. She has also found her fingers too suck on which helps her. My Dr suggested that napping usually goes better once they are STTN also. I know how hard it is when your friends can’t believe your baby only naps 45 min. when their’s naps 2 hours!! Take heart and enjoy the happy times with your little ones.
    June 26, 2008 10:57 AM
    Plowmanators said…
    Thanks Hannah! I have heard of many moms who tried CIO once, no luck, then tried it at an older age with success. Thanks for sharing your experience.
    June 27, 2008 11:17 PM
  • Stephanie said…
    hi, I’m so glad I found this site!!!! My month old son has been a terrible napper for forever. He is on a 3-3.5 hour schedule and usually takes 3 naps. The problem is he can never get past 45 minutes. I have tried to feed him but after two weeks there was no change. I have tried letting him cio but that doesn’t work either. I have tried giving him less wake time and more time but it doesn’t seem to matter. The only thing I have found to work for one of the three naps is if I go in and rock him from anywhere to 5-15 minutes when he wakes up and then he will usually go back to sleep for another 45 minutes to one hour. Is this o.k.? Is there a better way to get him to sleep the whole 1.5 hours?
    August 23, 2008 6:47 AM
    Plowmanators said…
    Stephanie, I think that sounds fine for this age. Just watch it to make sure that it doesn’t become a prop for him, but at this point your main goal is to establish metabolism and get good sleep in, so if you need to help him through transitions right now, I would do it.
    August 28, 2008 7:58 AM
  • Jesskarabow said…
    I feel like I’ve done a big no-no. My daughter Kara (7 mos) is a chronic 45 min napper. She’s been like this since birth with the occasional longer nap here and there. About 2 months ago, we noticed that she’ll sleep really long if someone’s holding her or laying with her – I know – BAD!. We started using this as a way to get at least 1 good nap in a day. But realistically, we can’t do this. I can’t sit on the couch or lay in the bed for 3 hours a day. I work 2 days a week, and now I noticed my grandmother is doing the same thing to get a good nap. I know this needs to stop, but she gets so tired. Her schedule is, wake at 6:30-6:45 go down for a nap about 8:30 (I still can’t figure out her sleepy cues consistently – I feel like a terrible mother). So:6:30 – wake8:30-9:15 nap9:15 – 11:00 play in crib/fuss on and off – after about an hour she may fall asleep for another 30 – 45 min – but it’s rare.11:00 – 12:30 eat & waketime – however she gets a little cranky after only an hour because of the 45 min nap.12:30 – 1:15 nap – and then the same as above.3:00 – eat & waketimewe’ve tried to drop the 3rd nap, but unless she’s gotten a good nap (ie: held for 2-3 hours) There’s no way she’ll make it to her 7:30 bed time.6:45 eats – starts bed time routine.As I said in a previous post – she was waking early in the morning – we realized that if she sleeps after 4:45/5:00 she’s be up at 5:15 the next morning. I just feel awful. I know I’ve started a bad habit and need to change that, but letting her sit in there for 1.5 hours makes me feel terrible. And her wake times get so short and unpleasant – I feel like I’m not seeing her happy for very long. She’s a beautiful, charming baby when she’s slept good. What do I do? If I accept the 45 min. nap, how do I keep a decent schedule with out a really cranky baby? I’ve tried to get the naps longer with CIO, paci, no paci, not going in to check, checking every 15 min, temp. humidifier, sound machine. The only thing that does it is holding her. By the way, on Sunday she napped awful before church, after church she fell asleep on the way home in her car seat — we left her in car seat in her room, and she slept for 2.5 hours, we were shocked. What’s up with that? Right now I can hear her — she’s been up in her crib since 9:50. She doesn’t really cry loud, she makes noise and talking, then will fuss for a few minutes (just sounds cranky) then goes back to happy talking. So it’s 10:45 and I think I’ll just get her up, but I know she’ll be miserable in an hour. If she slept for 45 min. and was able to keep a decent schedule & be happy for more than an hour I could just accept the 45 min naps, but that’s not happening. Any advice?
    December 3, 2008 12:42 PM
    Plowmanators said…
    Jesskarabow,Have you tried shortening waketime lengths? I think for most 7 month olds, 2 hours is going to be too long–though I am sure it is perfect for some.Don’t worry about dropping the third nap, wait until she is ready. Most don’t drop it until around 8 months, and that is with longer naps. You can also do a weaning process where she takes it some days and not others. One thing, her eating intervals are long. If she wakes at 6:30 (I assume she also eats then), then doesn’t eat again until 11, that is long. At most at this age you want 4 hours, and only if she is ready for that. I personally would get her up after she has been in bed after 1.5 hours if she is awake and not going back to sleep. She is more likely to get sufficiently tired if she has been out of bed for the proper waketime. Be sure to see these pots:Waketime: Length, Extending, and Calculating: When Baby Wakes Early : When They Wake Early: and Optimal Waketime Lengths : she have reflux? Some babies with reflux will sleep better in a carseat because they are inclined. It is also entire possible that she was really tired and some how soothed through the transition and slept long. Before I started BW with Brayden, he did that often. If she will eat every 3 hours, I think I would try that. You can then have a more successful routine. See also this post:Eat/Wake/Sleep Cycle:

    There is a good chance she just doesn’t know how to soothe herself. Since she will take a good nap with someone helping her, she is capable of taking the long nap but unable of doing it alone. Does she fall asleep on her own well? See also this post:Baby Whisperer: Sleep Transitions:
    December 5, 2008 2:35 PM
    Jesskarabow said…
    I’m trying the 3 hour schedule today. The only thing is she’s not really hungry in 3 hours. She had a 6 oz. bottle, cereal and fruit this morning for breakfast, but the next feeding she drank barely 3 oz. I’ll keep it up today. Also for naps that means she’ll be napping at 8:30, 11:30, 2:30 & perhaps 5:30. I don’t know if she can make 3:15 – 7:30 (We’ve keep her up in the past, but she miserable) is that too long for her to be up? But if she sleeps at 5:30 for 45 min. she’ll be really close to her 7:30 bedtime – afraid of her waking at 5:15 again – what would you do?Also, I think there might a self soothing problem also. Is there anyway I can help her learn this? Does the paci hinder her from learning how to self soothe?I can’t thank you enough for your help. What a ministry you have to women all over the world! The Lord is truly using you in a way I’m sure you never imagined :).
    December 9, 2008 8:51 AM
    Plowmanators said…
    Did you read this post I linked:Eat/Wake/Sleep Cycle: You don’t have to feed right after she wakes up–that post outlines that.Since she takes a 45 minute nap, you can still do 4. The goal for that age would be 3 naps (possibly two), but those three naps would be at least 1.5 hours long, with the third perhaps only being 45 mintutes. The paci can hinder the self-soothing process. See the blog label pacifiers. To teach her to self soothe, there are CIO (see the blog label CIO) and also methods by the Baby Whisperer. If you want to do her method, I would recommend getting her book.
    December 15, 2008 2:48 PM

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