- Meredith said... Thank you so much for this blog - It is so useful to me. I started my child with CIO at 6 weeks. It has only taken him a few days to deal with it. However, now he seems to be sleeping a LOT! I'm concerned he's not eating enough although his diapers are the same as before he started sleeping more. I decreased his wake time and he is taking a 2-2.5 hour morning nap and two 1.5 hour afternoon naps, and is very sleepy during feedings and after feedings except in the morning. Is this normal for a 6 week old?
January 2, 2008 3:06 PM
Plowmanators said... In my experience, yes. I was still fighting Kaitlyn to stay awake while she ate during her feedings at 6 weeks. Babies sleep a lot, and I think a common trend these days is to not have your baby sleep as much as they need. That trend seems to continue into toddlerhood and right on into adulthood. How many adults actually get the sleep they need in our society? Great job! I hope it continues to go so well!
January 2, 2008 5:46 PM
- Kristy said...
I have a three week old formula feed baby who will go through two three hour feedings in the afternoons without napping. During these six hours I have feed, changed, and held/played with her but when I put her down she will cry the entire time before the next feeding. I will check on her every 15-20 min to try to calm her down again but she will start crying again when I put her down. While I hold her she will calm down but not fall asleep. Some times this not falling asleep will carry into the 9:30-10:00 feeding when she will not fall asleep until after the next 12:30 feeding. What can I do to get her the nap during these times? She is napping in the mornings for 2 to 2 1/2 hours but I have a very difficult time keeping her awake for more than 15-30 minutes after the feedings.Thank youKristy
June 19, 2008 8:36 AM
Kristy, Sounds like you have a baby like Brayden was; doesn't really like to sleep. You likely have your work cut out for you, but believe me that it will be well worth the effort in a relatively short time. Then in the toddler years, you will be even more happy you did it. I will first recommend you see these posts. If you have questions beyond that, don't hesitate to ask:CIO Bootcamp: http://babywisemom.blogspot.com/2007/11/cio-bootcamp.html Waking Early From Naps/Won't Fall Asleep For Naps: http://babywisemom.blogspot.com/2008/01/waking-early-from-napswont-fall-asleep.html
Easy Nap Fix: http://babywisemom.blogspot.com/2008/01/easy-nap-fix.html
June 19, 2008 1:58 PM
CIO at Night:
- Katy said...
Hi there! I'm new to your blog and am really enjoying it. Thanks so much! I have a question that I haven't seen addressed anywhere:I have a 4 1/2 month old baby girl. Even though she'd go to a 4-hour schedule during the day without complaint, I keep her on a tight 3-hour schedule because she isn't sleeping through the night. She's a great napper and self-soothes with minimal or no crying.I know that Babywise says that some babies need to cry it out in the middle of the night, but what does that mean exactly? For 8 hours don't feed the baby? Let the baby cry until 3 or 4 hours have passed an the baby might truly be hungry?Last night I fed my baby at 6:30 (then bed), 9:30, 12:30, 3:30, and 5:30. (Yes, I'm exhausted!) I let her cry each time to make sure she was really awake and at 5:30 I tried to see if I could soothe her back to sleep without feeding since it had only been 2 hours (no luck). Each time the baby sucked vigorously and took a full feeding. She's just about average size-wise (not at all rollypolly) so I'm hesitant to drop feedings since she really does seem hungry. Because she would easily go 3.5 or 4 hours between feedings during the day if I let her I don't think I have a milk supply issue. I'm at a loss on what to do-- any thoughts?
May 8, 2008 7:34 AM
I think you are right to not move to a 4 hour schedule yet. Babies have an increase in need for food around 4 months, so she might be going through that. I also think you are right to make sure it isn't a hunger issue. It sounds like she has some reason for waking, and since she seems to be able to go longer in the day, I would tend to doubt it is hunger. I would guess either she is waking because she isn't able to self-soothe beyond a few hours, she is hot or cold, etc. I would really try to find out the problem.Once you have ruled out other options, you could CIO. See this post for other options. CIO in the night would mean whatever it means for you. The reason I suggest you rule out all other possibilities before doing it is so you can do it with confidence. Consistency is so key to CIO that you would have to be consistent to get good results. Good luck!
May 8, 2008 11:13 PM
- Amy said...
Hey, there- I posted a while back about my little one waking early. (I'm the one with 8 kids) We made some progress and had finally gotten to a place of sleeping from 9pm to 6am. Unfortunately, she got Roseola after that and then a cold right after that-such a bummer! I have been up at night quite a bit through all this but now that she is all better I really need to help her sleep through the night. She is 10 months old and having a full bottle at 10pm and then crying at 4:30am! I let her cry for about 30 min and then give in and feed her-desperate to get back to sleep myself! I feel so discouraged at times because my other children I did babywise with slept through by 9 weeks and then even longer nights, 11 hours or so not long after that...She is sleeping now and I am tempted to just not feed her the df tonight to see what happens. I think I need to do CIO and I may wait until my dh is out of town next week. I think I have ruled out every other reason for her night waking...other than double checking with her doctor again to be sure her ears are fine, etc.I guess I am looking for ideas...or just some hope.ThanksAmy
September 8, 2008 11:06 PM
Amy, one thing is if you aren't going to stick out the CIO, I wouldn't even start it. Your baby is definitely smart enough and persistent enough to realize a mear 30 minutes of crying will get you in there. So I would either go all the way or not at all.The dreamfeed can interfere with good night sleep, so you can definitely try dropping it and seeing what happens. I haven't ever done CIO in the night, but I ams sure with consistency and time, you can get there. Good luck!
September 12, 2008 1:09 PM
- jac said...
Hi! I am so thankful for your blog and all of your advice here. I am, obviously, a first time mom, and need some help with my son. He will be 9 weeks on Saturday, and, although we do a dreamfeed at 11pm, seems to wake at 4:30 each morning. Sometimes, it doesn't seem to matter when we do this feed however, he just wakes at 4:30am. Also, he eats at this feed, but not adamantly...he seems content to eat from one side, then nibble on the other, and fall asleep after de-latching himself and doing some 'playing' at the breast, it seems. He's a big boy(9.3 at birth), likely around 13-14 pounds. My question is: how do I know, in fact, that he isn't at least a little hungry, and therefore NEED that feed at 4:30am? Meaning, can I let him CIO yet? How will I know if it's hunger, in which case I wait for him to extend his night on his own, I guess? Or whether it's just habit, in which case I can let him CIO? I know I'm pushing the 9 week timeline here...is there anything else I can do to help extend the night? (I do the cluster feed 9:30 and 11pm already)Thank-you SO much!
December 3, 2008 6:26 AM
Jac, first, keep in mind that many babies take until 12 weeks to STTN, so don't stress about this. I know you are looking forward to it, but don't take this as a make or break of how well you are doing as a parent. There are really a lot that don't STTN until they are older than 12 weeks, so bear that in mind. Do you have a consistent waketime in the morning? If not, make sure you start that. If so, how does he eat at that time? If he is still taking a full feeding, chances are he needs that 4:30 feeding still. If he doesn't take a full feeding, he might be ready to drop it. See this post for ideas on that:
Early Morning Feedings Before Waketime: http://babywisemom.blogspot.com/2008/01/early-morning-feedings-before-waketime.html
December 5, 2008 11:53 AM
- Tanya Hebert said...
What are your thoughts on the crib-to-bed transition? My daughter is 21 months and we are starting to think about it. Are there any indicators as to when it's a good time? Any words of wisdom about making it a good transition all around? Do you recommend a toddler bed or going straight to a twin-size bed? Any thoughts/guidance you have is much appreciated. Thank you.
May 20, 2008 2:48 PM
Tanya, I did a post on crib to bed transitions today in response to your question :)
May 21, 2008 11:06 AM
- Stephanie said...
I have a couple questions...1) My 8 month old is taking two naps a day now, usually about 1 1/2 hours. Sometimes, it's 2 hours and sometimes it's only 1. Lately, her second nap has only been 1 hour long, which means she wakes about 3:00pm. Her last feeding is 8pm which makes bed time around 8:30. Since there is such a long time between 3 and 8, she's quite fussy in the evenings and I find myself doing things just "to kill time". I can't just play with her because she's not happy; I usually have to walk around and hold her, go for a walk, etc. I've tried putting her down for a little cat nap, but it hasn't worked..she just keeps crying and then it gets to be too late for her to sleep because then she won't be ready for bed at 8:30. She is still waking anytime between 4-5 in the morning which I am doing everything I can to get that to stop. Do you think putting her to bed earlier, like 7:30 would make her wake even earlier in the morning, or maybe because she's so tired at night, it's affecting her night sleep? I know that sleep begets sleep, but it's so hard to believe that if I put her to bed earlier, she's not going to wake earlier. Or maybe, I should just keep doing what I'm doing until she starts sleeping longer into the morning?My other question, regarding sleeping longer and putting her to bed earlier. I've never done a dream feed. I didn't even know what it was until a couple months ago, and she was already 6 months old, so I thought it's not something I should be starting at that age when most people are trying to stop it at that age. BUT, is it possible that that may help her sleep longer in the morning, or will that just create yet another habit I will have trouble breaking later? 8 months of only getting about 5 hours of sleep at a time, I'd almost rather df and have an uninterrupted night sleep, but I also don't want her to start relying on that and start waking for it. THANK YOU SO MUCH FOR YOUR HELP! I'm so exhausted; if I could afford it, I'd probably be taking my baby to see a sleep specialist! Sorry, I didn't realize this was so long. Thank you!! And congratulations on baby #3!!!
September 25, 2008 8:00 AM
Stephanie, Jenny, and Erin, I apologize--I missed all of your comments until now! If you are still having trouble, please let me know.
November 10, 2008 3:28 PM
Valerie,I am having the same problem Stephanie is/was having but my dd is 12 mos now! I am curious if Stephanie has posted anywhere-did things get better?Amy
November 12, 2008 7:11 AM
Amy, so far as I know, I haven't heard from Stephanie, but it is really hard to keep everyone straight :) See this post for ideas:Dropping the Morning Nap (from 2 to 1 naps): Transition Time : http://babywisemom.blogspot.com/2008/10/dropping-morning-nap-from-2-to-1-naps.html
November 22, 2008 4:14 PM
- Elizabeth said... I have some of the same problems as Anna. My daughter who is 8 weeks will only nap for one hour - especially in the morning - so it seems impossible to get her on a 3 hour schedule. She can only stay awake for 1 hour as well. At night she is really sporadic with how long she sleeps and when she wakes up. I would say she averages 4 hour stretches at night, but sometimes it's only 2 1/2 and others it's 5-6.
November 13, 2008 2:01 PM
Plowmanators said... Elizabeth, this is a common problem parents run in to. At that age 1 hour is acceptable for a nap, but no baby that age can stay awake for 2 hours. It just doesn't mathematically add up. See the naps posts for ideas on extending naps; she is old enough to realistically start sleeping longer.
November 19, 2008 3:04 PM
Naps and Night
- Mark said... Hi, i really enjoy your website--very helpful. have a coupel questions for you. my sara is 8.5 weeks old and is NOT napping well. she sleeps for thirty min (after cryign 5-10 when put down) then cries on and off during her whole naps. she is exclusively been breast fed and eating ~ 2.5 h or 3. i think she could go 3 all the time but i give in when she cries so much and try to feed her--she still falls asleep when eating 80% of the time. any advice welcome...... thanks, stacy
March 30, 2008 3:57 PM
Mark said... sara's mom again--forgot to mention earlier i have been trying to do babywise since around 2 weeks of age. she averages around 45-50 min for eating and wake time until she starts yawning and getting fussy. i am trying to drop middle of night feedings. she feeds @ 8-9pm and at 1130pm (we wake her for these)and i am trygin to get her to sleep till 630. she starts crying around 410 and goes on and off with cryign till 6 when i usually cave in and feed her. need some help from experienced BW mom.
March 30, 2008 4:02 PM
Plowmanators said... When she falls asleep eating, make sure you don't let her stay asleep, even for a couple of minutes. I noticed that when this happened with my daughter, she would cry a lot before a nap. She wasn't a big crier usually (our first nap for "CIO" she didn't cry even for a second). I finally figured out that when I let her sleep for a couple of minutes during a feeding, she would cry and cry at naptime. Here are a few posts I recommend if you haven't read them already:
CIO Bootcamp: http://babywisemom.blogspot.com/2007/11/cio-bootcamp.html
Waking Early From Naps/Won't Fall Asleep For Naps: http://babywisemom.blogspot.com/2008/01/waking-early-from-napswont-fall-asleep.html
For the middle of the night, I personally wouldn't work on that until she gets better at CIO in the day. You both need the sleep in the night to make it through the day. Keep in mind that 15% of babies don't start sleeping 7-8 hours until they are 10-12 weeks old. So I would wait until CIO in the day is going better--until she has figured out how to self-soothe. I would then evaluate the situation and go from there. There is a chance she will start STTN on her own once she knows how to self-soothe. If not, your nights of CIO will be significantly fewer if she knows how to self-soothe already. Good luck! It does get easier.
March 31, 2008 9:44 AM
Mark said... sorry to bother u again--thank you sooo much for ur advice. this is my delima--i go back to work in a week and i am trying to get her on the 7,10,1,4,7,10 schedule (i think that would work best for us)--she did great yesterday on it and naps were better--took ur advice about feeding. she is 11 pounds and 9 weeks on thurs--do u think she can go from 10pm till 7am? would you add a feeding around 4am. yesterday ate at 7,10,1,350,715,and 1030pm and woke at 245-300am just whiny and back to sleep with no intervention then at 5am woke crying and i fed her at 515 she ate for about 4-5 min on one side then slept and cried at 630 and i fed her at 645am. i am getting ANXIOUS about having to go back to work and how to best fit her schedule (i have to leave for work at 6am and my husband will take her to our cargiver @730 then i get off @ 3pm and can be with her @ 330p). i need HELP and advice on what schedule you would recommend...... i was hestiant to mess up her first am nap b/c those first 2 of the day are her best ones. (that is why i thought 7am would be good then my husband would leave house at 730 and she could be put down around 745am.
April 1, 2008 7:45 AM
Stacy,WEEKS 9-15Baby can gradually move to 9-10 hours of continuous sleep if breastfed, 11 hours if bottlefedOver the next few weeks, she should be able to sleep that amount of time. Until then, it might be a bit tiring for you with going back to work. It sounds like she needs to eat in the night still. I would wait before you respond like you did, but when she full-on cries, get her and offer a full feeding. It sounds like your projected schedule should work. Keep working toward it. Don't worry about the night feeding until you can tell she doesn't need it. Hang in there!
April 1, 2008 2:43 PM
Mark said... THANK YOU for your responses. i really enjoy your blog and find it so helpful!!!! one last question--would u just wake her up @ 3am or 4am and feed her or let her wake up crying then feed her even if it is 5 or 530am would you offer a full feeding since we are doing a 7am waketime.thank you :)stacy
April 1, 2008 4:49 PM
Plowmanators said... Stacy,Have you seen this post:Early Morning Feedings Before Waketime: http://babywisemom.blogspot.com/2008/01/early-morning-feedings-before-waketime.html I would just let her sleep until she wakes and feed her in the 5 hour. See that post for more ideas. Good luck!
April 1, 2008 10:36 PM
- ProudMum said... Hello,I have discussed before with u many of mine baby issues. I really got benefits from ur nap articles. she is self soother from around 2 months when she got her thumb. night sleeping is always fine. I never give her sleep training. my nap problem was identification of her wake time. which is 1 hr 10 min if she sleeps well before. she is now five months old today. but problem is that she always wakes up crying after 1 hour. i let her cry for sometimes but it didnt solve the problem so I always feed her and then she goes to sleep. so I never be on 3 hr schedule. She is not taking solids.Same is the case with her she always wakes up at 6:25 am and need feed which is around 5 mins and then she takes time and goes back to sleep.I am worried because when she finally wakes up around 8:30 or 9 she is not genuinely hungry. So how should I handle both of these situations.
July 22, 2008 9:56 AM
Plowmanators said... Proudmum,For your 6:30 feeding, see this post:Early Morning Feedings Before Waketime: http://babywisemom.blogspot.com/2008/01/early-morning-feedings-before-waketime.html Have you tried a shorter waketime for naps? It sounds like she doesn't know how to soothe herself through a transition and so she is using you. See this post: Waking Early From Naps/Won't Fall Asleep For Naps: http://babywisemom.blogspot.com/2008/01/waking-early-from-napswont-fall-asleep.html
July 23, 2008 3:30 PM
ProudMum said... baby is five months now. i have started solids. she eats all of it with great interest, but she wanna take nap right after it. even if its not time of nap is it normal?
July 24, 2008 3:01 AM
Plowmanators said... ProudMum, So did you start solids then? A couple of days ago you said your baby didn't take solids. It is not normal to nap right after a meal.
July 25, 2008 1:58 PM
- Anna said... Hi, I have a nine-week old little girl who is a really good baby. She's breastfed, but she's not really sleeping through the night yet, and her night time sleep doesn't make sense to me. For example, one night I fed her at 8, put her down at 9 and she slept until 4:30. I know, that's great, BUT the next night, I did the same except I added a dream feed at about 11. She slept until 4:30. And, it's not always 4:30, so I don't think she's "stuck". Last night, she took 5.5 ounces (I pump for her last feeding so I know she gets enough) at 11 p.m. and woke up at 3:30. I feed every three hours. She's napping for about an hour in each three hour cycle, but she ends up having that nap in the middle of the cycle. I can't seem to get her to stay awake long enough to make the hour the last hour of the cycle, if that makes sense. Any advice you have would be great!
November 13, 2008 1:06 PM
Plowmanators said... Anna, see the blog label "naps" for ideas on fixing the naps.As far as STTN, understand that many babies don't STTN until 12 weeks old (many even older) so I wouldn't worry about that.Also, some don't sleep as well with a dreamfeed as they do without. If your baby isn't sleeping better with the dreamfeed, then just forget about it. Then you can go to bed earlier :)
November 19, 2008 3:03 PM
- monkeymom said...
My daughter is 14 weeks old. She goes to bed between 630p and 700p. She usually wakes around 10-11pm and eats a 6oz bottle and then again at 3am (although this has been 5am for the past two days). I have to wake her up at 7am and she is usually still sound asleep. When she wakes she is happy, but not hungry. Do you have suggestions on whether I should try to drop the 3am feeding and if so should I try decreasing the amount of formula as mentioned in some of the blogs before? Also she naps (on a good day) from 9am-11am and then from 1pm-3pm. Should she have a third nap in there somewhere?thanks!
August 26, 2008 11:18 AM
Yes, you should have a third nap, but only about 45-60 minutes long. You can certainly try dropping that night feeding. It shoulds like she is moving toward that. See this post for more:
Early Morning Feedings Before Waketime: http://babywisemom.blogspot.com/2008/01/early-morning-feedings-before-waketime.html
August 30, 2008 9:22 PM
- jencwu said... Sorry, I'm not sure if this is the right place for this question or not, but I couldn't find what I was looking for. Typically we don't have any problems with our little one sleeping at night... I let him fall asleep nursing after he's gotten a full meal and he will stay asleep for 4-5 hours usually. Last night was quite different though. He woke up around his usual time, about 3:30 to feed. After he finished and fell asleep, I put him in his crib as usual about 4:30. As soon as I got to my bedroom, however, he awoke and cried on and off for an hour until I got up to nurse him more. He was not very interested in eating but did fall asleep again. So once again, I laid him in his crib only to hear him crying when I got into my room again. At this point I decided to let him CIO and my husband took over so I could get a little sleep. He finally fell asleep about 45 mins later at 6:15 but only slept for 45 mins because then it was time for him to wake up and eat. What would you recommend for these types of situations? This is really the first time this has happened. (You probably know this from my other posts but he is almost 6 weeks old)
August 31, 2008 4:43 PM
I do know that 6wks is when my little guy hit a growth spurt-and he didn't necessarily want to eat more, but definitely was a little more finicky through the night.This is about where we started creating bad habits because he didn't eat-I though something had to be wrong and felt sorry for him and started rocking him back to sleep.
September 1, 2008 2:17 PM
Thanks Lorri for your thoughts. 6 weeks is a growth spurt age, so you definitely need to watch for that, and it is always good to caution against starting bad habits.
September 5, 2008 10:11 AM
jencwu, thanks for posting the age--there are so many people who comment here that I have no chance of remembering each child's age :)For a one night occurence, I think I would have done pretty much like you. I would have listened to the cry at 4:30 for about 10 minutes while I figured out the reason for the crying. If it sounded like he was in need of help, I would have gone in and checked the diaper. But I don't think I would have fed him again. One hour is definitely not needed if he took a full feeding the first time. I would have made sure all was well, then put him in bed and let him cry.One thing I would wonder about if this continues to happen is if your holding him until he is asleep is causing it. I would feed him and when he is done eating, put him in bed.
September 5, 2008 10:10 AM
- kathrynyanus said...
Hi. My son is 20 weeks old. For the last month or so he's been sleeping from 10 or 10:30pm until 7am. All has been going well there. He also has been doing very well napping during the day. About 2 weeks ago we went from (3) 2-hour naps to (2) 2-2.5hr. naps with 2 short cat naps as needed. All was good there too. Now all of the sudden, he's not sleeping well. For the past 3 nights he has either gotten up in the middle of the night (sometimes 1am, other times 4am) or woke early (5 or 6am instead of 7am). I go into his room and settle him and he goes back down. And for the naps, he's really giving me trouble. He only sleeps about an hour and then he's up and mad (screaming). I give him 10-15 minutes to settle himself but now he won't do that anymore. I even let him CIO for 30 minutes but that didn't work. When I finally get him from his nap, he's not super hungry. I've even increased the amount of rice cereal I give him just in case he's going through a growth spurt. The only thing I can think of is that this all started when I started giving him rice cereal. But I was always told that giving him the cereal would help him sleep BETTER, not worse. I am not sure what to do, but I don't want to keep going into his room during naps and the middle of the night to settle him down for fear of this becoming habit. Any suggestions or thoughts?
January 6, 2009 12:44 PM
He might have an intolerance for rice. Some do. And some get gassy and in pain with rice. I would first take him off of rice and see if that helps. Give him a few days for it to get out of his system.See also this post: 5-8 Month Sleep Disruptions : http://babywisemom.blogspot.com/2008/05/6-month-sleep-disruptions.html
January 10, 2009 2:01 PM
- ProudMum said...
baby 13 weeks old. she some nights sleep from 8:30 to 5:30 am without feeding and some nights she wake up at 3 for it. in this one week she does that. This is not a growth spurt for sure. i am breastfeeding her. what cud be reason?i check everything at night nothing is changed.
May 23, 2008 6:07 AM
ProudMum, It could be a lot of things. See this post for ideas:Nighttime Sleep Issues: http://babywisemom.blogspot.com/2008/01/nightime-sleep-issues.html
May 23, 2008 4:56 PM
thanx for ur reply.she sleeps at 8:30pm and she takes four naps. last nap is 45 min and first nap is hardly 30 min and remaining two are around 1.5 hrs. what shud i change to stop 5:30 am waking . becuz she doesnt sleep after feed she sleeps at 6:30 and wakes up at 7:30. please advice me. she is 13 weeks old.
May 24, 2008 11:35 AM
ProudMum, Be sure your waketime isn't too long. At that age, it should be about an hour long. See this post for those early morning wakings:Early Morning Feedings Before Waketime: http://babywisemom.blogspot.com/2008/01/early-morning-feedings-before-waketime.html
May 26, 2008 10:06 AM
wake time when ? before night time sleep or when she wakes up?
May 27, 2008 5:22 AM
By waketime I mean playtime. The period between when she wakes up and goes down for her next nap or for bed for the night.
May 27, 2008 10:55 PM
- sarah said...
my second child is 9 months old and has always been a challenge for me. my first child was a great "babywise" baby. my 9 month old is starting to wake up at 6 and sometimes 630, when she used to wake up at 7 or 730. i let her cry it out usually but only for about 30 minutes because i dont want her waking up her older brother. im still nursing her and she eats table food. she takes two naps ranging about 1 1/2 to 2 hours in length. any suggestions on getting her to sleep a little longer. she goes to bed for the night at 8. thanks so much.
August 13, 2008 7:21 AM
Sarah, If I were you, I wouldn't even do CIO if you aren't going to stick with it. I understand why you aren't, and I am sure a 9 month old is sure that you aren't. One thing to remember that according to BW, 10 hours of sleep is acceptable. She might just be a baby who does not need a lot of sleep. A good thing about that is that people tend to keep the same sleep dispositions, so you might have a nicer time in the teenage years :) 10-12 Hours of Sleep: http://babywisemom.blogspot.com/2008/07/10-12-hours-of-sleep.html
August 13, 2008 8:32 PM
- The Parkers said...
A couple questions about STTN: My son is 10 weeks old tomorrow. He dropped his middle-of-the-night feeding at about 3 weeks (what a blessing!!). We still do a dream feed at 10:30pm, and then he sleeps through the night. The issue for us is that he is not at all consistent with his wake time in the morning. It is usually between 4:45 - 5:45am, although I am desperate for it to be a consistent 6am. My questions are: (1) For a 10-week-old, if he goes back to bed after his dreamfeed at 11pm, he should be able to sleep until 6am, right? (Or does the dream feed not count because he doesn't really wake up, in which case his sleep time really begins when he goes to bed at 7pm?) (2) We have somewhat tried CIO to extend his sleep time to 6am, but not very religiously. If he wakes at 4:40, should I just let him belt it out until 5:30 (within the half hour window), or until 6:00 (when I'd prefer that he wake up)?(3) Do I wait until he has a consistent morning waketime before I start trying to remove the dreamfeed? (For context, he currently eats about 7oz of breastmilk, 6 feedings per day -- he's a hungry kiddo!)Thanks!
- December 11, 2008 7:46 AM
Parkers,1-Yes, in theory a 10 week old could make it 7-8 hours after the last feeding, but a certain percentage don't do that until 12 weeks or older.2-That is up to you. If you think he is not hungry, you can try CIO. If you do decide to try CIO, be consistent with it. If you aren't consistent, it won't work.3-You want to wait a couple of weeks after STTN at least before dropping the dreamfeed. See the lable "Dreamfeed" for more on that.
December 18, 2008 2:58 PM
- susanne said...
Hi Again. First, thank you thank you thank you for answering all of my questions. I find your blog extremely helpful and glad I stumbled across it! My son started to sleep 7-8 hours a night at 8 weeks old. He did this for 2 weeks. Then just this week (11 weeks old) he has regressed to only sleeping 6 hours of sleep. One night it was only a 5 hour stretch. Will he get back to 7-8 hours of sleep without my help? Or should I do something to encourage him to sleep 7-8 hours again? I know that baby wise says that by 12 weeks babies should be able to sleep at least 10 hours so I am not sure what is going on. Here is my current schedule. 8:00 Wake & Feed10:301:304:007:009:4010:00 Bed** He was typically waking just once between 4:30-6:00 for one additional feeding (but now that he is only sleeping 6 hours he seems to need 2 feedings in the night.)Do you think I need to add an additional feeding in? My experience with a dreamfeed in the past is that it messes up his night time sleep and does not sleep for a long stretch at night. So do you have any other suggestions on how to get an additional feeding in without a dreamfeed? Thanks for you help!
December 12, 2008 8:58 AM
Okay, I wanted to update you since I wrote my last comment. My son started to sleep for 7-8 hours again. Perhaps he was going through a growth spurt when he started to wake at night after only sleeping for 5-6 hours. Either way we are back to sleeping longer stretches. He even slept for 8.5 hours last night . Thanks for your blog! I've enjoyed reading it.
December 15, 2008 8:50 AM
Susanne, I am glad the sleep went back to where you want it. Just FYI, BW says by 15 weeks, not 12 weeks, baby can sleep 9-10 (not 10) hours at night. The ages are between 9-15 weeks. For most, it is a gradual move toward 10 by week 15.
December 18, 2008 3:01 PM
Thanks for responding to my previous question from this posting. Also, thanks for clarifying how much sleep he should be able to achieve right now. You have been a huge blessing in my life and I am glad that you have taken the time to respond to all our questions. I have another questions related to my previous question. My son is now 14 weeks old. He is currently sleeping about 7-8 hours of sleep a night. He wakes up about 2 hours before his wake time and I give him just a few minutes of nursing (2-4 min) an put him right back to bed. Based on his age, he should be able to sleep for at least 9 hours, right? I have read your post about early morning waking and I have slowly started to decrease the amount I feed him. I know with your daughter you just decreased the amount, but was there ever a point once you decreased the amount you feed her that you had to let her cry a little? I hope you had a Merry Christmas and Have a wonderful New Year!
December 31, 2008 9:13 PM
Susanne, You were the last comment of 2009! Thanks for your thanks, I appreciate it :)I never had to have Kaitlyn cry at all in the night, but that doesn't mean no one ever does. I think once you get down to the next step being no food, you can try CIO and see what happens. Good luck!
January 6, 2009 6:57 PM
Umm...Susanne...you probably figured this, but I meant last of 2008, not 2009 :)
January 8, 2009 2:05 PM
I knew that you meant 2008 :) Thanks again for your imput/ help. I hope that you pregnancy has been going well so far. I will continue to keep you in my prayers.
January 8, 2009 2:29 PM
Thanks Susanne. I really do appreciate the prayers.
January 14, 2009 5:17 PM
- wearyparents said...
Hi I have been reading you blog for a few weeks now and want to say thankx it has helped me a great deal. However, we are really struggling at the moment. My almost 19 week old has never sttn. We are still up at least once during the night. He is on a 31/2 hr routine and does quiet well during the day. He starts he day at 6.30am and has his last feed at 5pm in bed by 6 then I dream feed him at 9.30pm. Then he wakes between 2 - 4am. At first he was having a feed at this time now its like he wakes out of habit and wakes up so much he wants to play. I will often offer a short feed however he comes on and off smiling at me. If we leave him to cry he can go on for an hour and wakes up my 2 1/2 yr old. He just wont settle back to sleep and cries and cries. We usually will go in and out on iregular intervals and try to settle him with patting and soothing. Im out of ideas. My husband and I are so tired. Any suggestions would be much appreciated.
December 18, 2008 4:11 PM
If you are sure he is waking out of habit and not need, I suggest the following post for ideas on how to break this feeding without CIO: Early Morning Feedings Before Waketime: http://babywisemom.blogspot.com/2008/01/early-morning-feedings-before-waketime.html
December 29, 2008 3:24 PM
- bcb said...
Hi there, I just discovered your blog and have been visiting daily as I've been using Babywise and various other books from the start. I have a question concerning my 14 week old daughter. From the beginning she has always been a really great sleeper - only getting up once a night for a feeding and sleeping 4-5 hours at a time from the day she was born. About a month and a half ago we stopped her middle of the night feeding as she didn't seem to need it. She would only get up around 3ish and cry for her pacifier and would go right back to sleep as soon as it was in her mouth. She would then get up around 6 for a feeding and I would put her back to bed for a few more hours until 9am or so. Well, for the last week and a half, she has been getting up more and more throughout the night. Last week she started to get up around 4am and 5 am for her pacifier, then a few days later it was 3am, 4am, and 5am consistently and last night it was 1am, 3am, 4am, and 5am...I do not think she is hungry as she goes right back to sleep with the pacifier but seems to have an issue with falling back asleep on her own if the pacifier falls out. We had her on a feeding schedule of every 3.5 hours for the past 2 weeks, eating about 6oz each time. However, after she began waking up more in the middle of the night, we decided to go back to feeding her every 3 hours. When this didn't improve things, we thought maybe she was sleeping too much since we were putting her to bed at around 7pm every night, swaddled in her crib, then waking her around 9:30/10 for a quick feeding then back to bed again. We were also putting her back to bed, swaddled in her crib, after her 6am feeding. She would be out cold during these naps. We've now been trying to keep her up until 9pm, removing that 2 hour nap in the evening, and the past few days have also stopped her 2 hour nap after her 6am feeding...instead trying to get her to take a few good naps during the day. Nothing has worked. Do you think she was sleeping too much? Should we go back to putting her down at 7pm and 7am? I'm completely at a loss...thanks in advance!!
January 14, 2009 10:41 AM
bcb, There are several possibilities. One is growth spurt. Did she have her 3 month growth spurt yet? That is the first thing to check and rule out.Second is possibly needing only 3 naps in the day. So is your waketime for the day 6 AM or 9:30/10? If it is 9:30/10, I would either move her bedtime back or waketime up so that from bed to the time you expect her to be up for the day is not more than 12 hours (10-12 hours). Third is the possibilty of it being a common 4 month problem (4 month Sleep Problems : http://babywisemom.blogspot.com/2008/05/4-month-sleep-problems.html ).Finally is the pacifier. My thought is that if it isn't a growth spurt, it is the pacifier. I get A LOT of questions from moms with babies about the age of your baby who are suddenly experiencing sleep trouble because of the pacifier. I don't have experience with pacifiers, but link a good article about it in this post: Pacifiers : http://babywisemom.blogspot.com/2008/04/pacifiers.html
January 20, 2009 1:41 PM
- Doug and Jennifer Gross said...
I am so glad I found your blog. My son is 19 weeks and still does not sleep through the night. I think total he has 3 nights since he was born. I have followed Babywise almost to the tee and don't know what to do. He will only sleep 3 to 4 hours at night and then wake up. I stopped his nighttime feeding at least a month ago and he is eating solids now. He naps well during the day, three 2 hour naps. He is on a 4 hour routine and it doesn't seem to bother him. He wakes up happy from naps and waits the full 4 hours to eat. Please help! He is eating 5 times a day, I don't put him to bed until around 10 because if I put him down at 7 he would be up by 11. I have tried to let him CIO but he just keeps crying. What should I do?
January 15, 2009 7:26 AM
Jennifer, see these posts:Nighttime Sleep Issues: http://babywisemom.blogspot.com/2008/01/nightime-sleep-issues.html
Baby Whisperer: Sleeping Through the Night : http://babywisemom.blogspot.com/2008/09/baby-whisperer-sleeping-through-night.html
January 20, 2009 3:25 PM
- boysrus said...
Hi there,Please help....My third son is 9 weeks old and isn't being consistant at night. He sleeps from8:30 till about 3:30/4:30 am most times but then throws in a 1:30am...What am I doing wrong. He dropped the 11:30pm feed on his own a few weeks ago. I've tried doing a DF around 10/10:30pm but most nights he wont have it and when he does have a DF he seems to do worse at night....WHY??? He's on a three hour schedule during the day and does great with it. My two older boys would go from 1am till 7am and then I would move the feed back to 12am and then to 10pm within no time....both were sleeping from 10pm till 7am at 8 weeks of age...why isn't it working with this one...he sleeps 6-8 hrs a night but early instead of later. How do I get him to switch to 10pm -7am?? HELP I'm so tired during the day with a two year old who keeps me extrememly busy whether I slept good or not....uuuuggghhhh!!thanks,Tina
February 5, 2009 7:51 AM
A small percentage of parents find that their child does much worse at night with a dreamfeed. Kaitlyn was that way. She eventually had one, but it was just the 8 PM feed that moved back over time.Not all babies sleep through the night by 8 weeks. It wouldn't be that there is something wrong with him or you; it just happens. Boys especially rarely sleep through the night by 8 weeks, so the fact that you had two do it is something to he happy about :)I understand your tiredness. I would suggest you go to bed earlier so you can get a long chunk of sleep in when you can. I had to do that with Kaitlyn for a while. You just can't rest as much in the day with a two year old, and you need your sleep for patience with older kids. See the blog label "sttn" for ideas on troubleshooting, but from what you told me, it isn't that there is something wrong but just that he isn't there yet. Good luck and hang in there!
February 10, 2009 6:57 AM
Thank you. I'm going to let him go from his late evening feed (7:30/8pm) and hope and pray he starts sleeping till 7:30 am soon enough. And to think I thouht #3 was going to be a piece of cake at night....LOL. I'm glad to hear it's not something I'm doing wrong!!Thanks,Tina
February 10, 2009 2:56 PM
Sometimes it is good to hear :)I remember hearing from a mother of 8 several months ago. Her first 7 had been no problem, but #8 threw her for a loop! So it happens to everyone :)
February 12, 2009 5:00 PM
- TBird said...
Hey Val.My question is about the middle of the night feeding. My DD usually wakes between 2a and 4a for a feeding. But the last couple of nights, she's been waking at 1:30am. My question is, should the middle of the feeding get gradually closer to the dreamfeed(10p), or the waketime feeding(7a)?I just assume it's supposed to get closer to the waketime feeding and eventually she'll drop it, but it makes sense to get closer to the DF feeding too.
February 12, 2009 11:44 AM
Both ways do make sense. With both of mine, the feeding got closer to morning waketime. Some just flat out drop it. I am sure moving it back closer to the DF is possible, but it might also be a growth spurt thing.
February 17, 2009 8:57 PM
- Kerri said...
Hi there,I stumbled upon your blog the other day. I have three children. I used BW with the older two and am using it as well with my 3 month old. We are having problems with night time with our 3mo old. Here current schedule is 7:30 wake up and nurse.(very consistent because I will wake her even if she doesn't wake on her own)8:45 goes down for a nap. She is swaddled for her nap and cries for about 5 minutes and then goes to sleep. She sleeps till 10:30am.10:30am nurse12:00 (sometimes a little bit early) naps till 1:30 or 2pm.2pm nurse3:30 or 4 down for nap. This is a tough nap for her. She seems to consistently wake at 4:30. Sometimes I am succesful at getting her back to sleep before her 5pm feeding. I go in and check on her tell her everything is ok pat her back for a moment and leave the room.5pm nurse7pm nurse7:30 bed10:00 dream feedthen the fun begins :( For the past 4 nights she has woken up between 2 and 2:30 am. Before that she would wake up anywhere between 2 and 4. I would nurse her and she would go right back to sleep and then we would start our day at 7:30. However because she started waking at the same time each night I was pretty sure she was stuck on a time and not hungry. So we have been trying to briefly comfort her and then leave the room and let her CIO. She likes to be swaddled but can get compeltely unswaddled in the night. I've tried everything I can think of to make sure she can't get out. I think that she might be waking up because she has become unswaddled. However I don't think going in and reswaddling her each time will help her sttn in the long run? Dh and I decided to try CIO. We just finished our second night and we are both very tired and very discouraged. She will wake it two we will comfort her and make sure she is ok and then the crying continues for about 10 min. She fell asleep for 45 min and then was back up cried for 30 or 45 min. Slept for an hour and then woke up at 4am at which point I fed her because we agreed I would nurse her at 4am if she woke. We felt like we had to put some end time on the whole ordeal. I'm sorr this is so long. Any suggestions? I thought an outside perspective might be helpful.Thank you so much for your time. Kerri
February 19, 2009 9:23 AM
Kerri, typically if the baby falls back asleep then wakes soon after, she isn't really ready to STTN. I would say she is either hungry or waking for some other reason (like the swaddle). Three months is a growth spurt time. If she is hungry, feed her. If she is waking because of the swaddle, consider dropping it. good luck!
February 24, 2009 1:49 PM